why do we need GOD!

before i start i do not mean to offend anyone in the process of writing this.

i have been thinking it for a while. Why do we need God? if we are sad/depressed/ need someone to talk things to, "most" of us will go to our closest friends rather than pray to "God" ( or a higher entity) why do we do this? Well in my opinion we go to our closet friends because we know we will get a answer straight away, rather than praying and have no guaranty of getting a answer.

i put it on facebook and a friend posted this

Fear seems to be a good motivator. [I don't have a quote!]

I think a lot of people are afraid of a life when you have to consider the possibility that there is no higher power to control life, and nowhere to go when we die. That this is just it, we make our own destiny, good things happen to bad people and vice versa because that's the way the world is, not because there is a God [or Gods] to dictate it. Personally, I'd rather believe in people than God; and I'd rather be afraid of the finality of a fragile life than believe in something that I can't prove will be there to save me.

i think that sums it up pretty well.

i was talking to a old friend in Ipswich who used to go to church with me but moved to ipswich and has been questioning faith. and he heard a quote "On the sixth day, God created man. On the seventh day, man returned the favor"

This is all coming about due to me questioning the way the church is run nowadays and its attitude towards young Christians.

and to sum it up

When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad, and that is my religion.

Abraham Lincoln

Times have changed

Just been reading back on my old blogs, and has hit me how much iv changed since my 1st blog years ago,( and yes andy i know u said it as i am writing this)

This week is going pretty well, been on easter hols ( AMAZING) just been working in the garden which i have to say even though its hard, its quite enjoyable.

a new most embarrassing moment in my life happened yesterday. singing to my i pod and 2 people walk past my drive and just look at me and smiled.

and to make it even better, 2 weeks today i will be down in Mersea :) be so so good to catch up with everyone.
Couple of days left of my holidays till im back at college and then only got something like 20 ( educational days) left at college till i leave and go to Gleneagles

A year on

So its been a year since i moved to Scotland with parents. it seems like only yesterday that i was leaving Mersea, and now i have nearly finished a year at college.

I am planning to make a trip down south to Mersea, and it hit me that i still miss them all so so much. I have made some great friends, have found a great church and with a really nice congregation.

I have enjoyed the new adventure but there is always going to be a place in my heart for Mersea

And in the last couple of weeks ago i got in contact with a old friend, and am shocked that i did not contact her sooner, she was a good friend in 2007 and she is a great friend now in 2011.

i am going to try and do regular blogs now and not just once every few months

Back again

Hey

Its been years since i last blogged, about drink problems,

i can safley say now that i am still drinking but i can go and enjoy 1 pint with friends and leave it at that.

i am living in Scotland now, been up here for 6 months, but cant find a church ( which aint good)

i feel my self drifting away from God and church, i am back in mersea in 2 weeks and really want to go to the free church on that sunday im down, but fell to detached from God and church.

i dont know what i will do?

Boulder WOW

Last night was fantastic, the boulder leadership team had a meeting at PG's house last night,

I am so excited about where boulder is going in the next year, we had loads off idea's and things that we wanted to do.


i feel that God is telling em todo this not only because i will become closer with him, but also because off the jounrney that he wants me to go on.

and next week is GOING TO BE AMAZING

Monday --- Rock Solid meeting
Tuesday --- Causewar Deep Meeting
Wednesday--- in chelmsford with katie
Thurs -- Rock Solid and Boulder
Friday i am off to Turkey


WOW bring on the weekend

O yea and almost forgot 72 HOURS DRY NO ALCOHOL

Spiritual attacks Parrt 2

Today i am feeling rubbish, i just feel like i am gettign attacked on all sides, at lunch today i so nearly went to the pub and had a drink.

i knew it woudl be hard but its been less than 3 days and i am already needing alcohol.

And to rub salt in the wound, work today has been utter trash, we are short staffed and some off the people who are her just cant be bothered to work.

i really dont know how i am going to do this

spiritual attacks

Today i was hoping was going to be as good as yesterday.

yesterday i gave all my alcohol to katie, but when i got in my car this morning ther was a 4 pack of cider on my front seat ( as wierd as that may sound, but i knew i had no can in my car last night). i realised that the enemy is going to be trying as hard as anything to stop me doing this.

through out today i have been having negative thoughts put in my head:

i am not good enough
i am rubbish at my job
i am not welcome in the church
or any off the church related groups

and the worst on is that i am not worthy off Gods Love.

but still God is standing by me and i have been dry for 48 hours. only 2 days but it is a start

i realised tonight that the "enemy" is going to be everywhere just looking for me to show a sign off weakness and when i do he is going to use it and start putting negative thoughts in my head again.



i came into my bedroom tonight and it was really cold compaired to the rest off the house, and it had a bad feeling so i am constantly praying for protection and safety tonight.

I feel that i am taking slow progress, but it is better than none